Pest Control
by Uncle.Dragon
Summary: Chuck Norris and the Merc-With-A-Mouth Deadpool, they are the best in the PEST CONTROL business.


Deadpool and Chuck Norris, and their Singaporean Dragon- **(they whack down the Dragon with their fists, screen rewinds back to the beginning)**

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><p>Ahem,<p>

Chuck Norris and Deadpool, are in Gensokyo once more, after watching a very cruel and heartbreaking video online. They are outside of a house, Chuck rings the doorbell. And Homura Akemi answers the door.

"Hello?" the young girl greets.

"Yes, are you from that video on Youtube?" Deadpool questions.

Homura did not understand.

"Let me try." Chuck states, "Are you from that video on Youtube?"

"Hm-hm." Homura nods.

"The one about killing this Doctor Kyuubey?" Deadpool questions.

Homura still did not understand.

"The one about killing Kyuubey?" Chuck repeated as he fished out a picture of Kyuubey and showed it to her.

"Yeah." Homura replies, as she understood with a smile, "So, you boys got my message huh? Come right this way, that animal is busy eating up Miki Sayaka's Soul Gem, corrupted to the point where it tastes like sashimi."

Homura leads Deadpool and Chuck into her room, where Kyuubey was happily patting its stomach in a room surrounded by lewd pictures of Kaname- I mean; Homura Madoka.

"_Aye sei lou!" _Deadpool called out to the Incubator in Cantonese.

"Yea-"

Chuck kicks up Kyuubey, to which Deadpool steps inside and stomps on the Incubator as it crashes to the ground. Chuck begins punching it while Kyuubey's face are rooted to the ground. He then picks it up by its head, holding it as another fist from Deadpool and punches it in the face. Homura joins the fun by pulling out a hand-gun, and which she shot all of its legs, as Chuck kept holding Kyuubey while Deadpool punches all over its bloody body like a punching bag. Deadpool grabs the Kyuubey's head and rams it into a wall, over and over again.

"HOLD IT!"

Chuck and Deadpool were stopped suddenly by a shout from Homura.

"Watch where you boys are splattering the blood! Thank Nappa that I had already laminated that Madoka-in-bikini + cat-ears poster, because otherwise I am gonna have to take the damages off your paychecks!" Homura scolded Chuck and Deadpool, both men looking down sheepishly, "Now take a few steps away from the wall, and CONTINUE!"

Chuck took Kyuubey away from the poster, and continued where Deadpool left off as the latter entered the bathroom to the home and turns the water on in the tub. Chuck swaggered into the bathroom, choking the life out of Kyuubey, and sticks its head under the water in the tub.

"HOW DO YOU LIKE IT HUH?" Deadpool yells, "HOW DO YOU LIKE IT! YOU FUCKING ANIMAL! THIS IS WHAT YA GET FOR CHEATING OFF SWEET-INNOCENT-GIRLS!"

Chuck pulls the Incubator's head from the water, to which, Deadpool boxes. Chuck then sticks its head back under water. The water soon is red with blood. Deadpool leaves the room as Chuck pulls its head up again, before coming back with a certain redhead on a dog-leash.

"Hold it right there," Homura halted as she points at the redhead suspiciously, "Sakura Kyouko?"

"Ruff ruff!" Kyouko barked back, "I am just earning my paycheck here lady, no offense, besides... this little bitch owes me for Sayaka." Homura took a deep sigh at Kyouko's reply, "Oh well, just make sure you don't dirty the place too much, it's rented with Madoka's money."

"Oookay!" Kyouko sang as Deadpool freed her to bite and tear off flesh from Kyuubey, which keeps screaming throughout the entire ordeal. Chuck calls Kyouko off, before picking Kyuubey back up, carries it from the bathroom, then slams it to the ground, where himself, Kyouko, Homura and Deadpool stomp on Kyuubey. Deadpool pulls out his swords and slices the Incubator's paws off. Kyouko then stabs it in the chest with her spear, Homura pulls out her shotgun and blew its head off, killing Kyuubey permanently.

"I love puppies." Chuck states.

"Yeah, me too." Deadpool adds.

"Ruff!" Kyouko agreed.

Chuck snaps his fingers, to which, the Dragon earlier appears in the room with them.

"Yes, Mr. Norris?" the Dragon questions.

"Bill please" Chuck orders. The Dragon then proceeds to collect the cash from Homura.

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!"

It was Madoka, she screamed because she saw her idols; Chuck Norris and Deadpool, in her apartment, so she immediately rushed to her room for their autograph...

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><p>Meanwhile, the portrait of Tomoe Mami hanging in the living room gave a wink.<p> 


End file.
